We don't always like being nonplussed

Monday, July 18, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 8 (Like a Rolling Creepy Thing.)

So we're back, and it's Monday, Monday, Monday, a very, very fun day... no one will get that reference.

I can't remember much over my weekend break from the game, aside from us having to find a way to get some girl out of prison, I think. If that's the case, then the poor girl is pretty much out of luck, since I'm a ghost.

I'm really hoping that the next plot trigger is inside this little village somewhere, because I don't know where to look around here. I'll start by searching every house and building, and maybe talking to people with non standard sprites.

Meet Milly! Previously mistranslated as 'Milayou,' which is Enix USA not realizing that 'Mire-yu' is the Japanese spelling for the French name 'Mireille.'
That's a non standard sprite if I've seen one, and I have... Wait, I think I recognize that guy/girl. Isn't that the guy/girl from the start of the game? They look like some sort of elven wizard, but I could be wrong, because I only rolled a 10 on my spot check, and with my wisdom mod, I only have a +3. Damn you cross class skills!... Wait, wrong game.

Holy crap, they can see me! It's like waiting at a restaurant table for an hour and a half, trying to get the attention of a waiter! They've finally seen me! I can't believe it!... They fucking left! Why?! Did I smell or something? I'm going to blame purple mohawk guy for this one, since he just looks like the sort of guy that doesn't bathe that much.
I give the town a second once over, and since I can find nothing other than the dog poisoner standing at the stove in one house, I guess that I head out and start to explore...

Her original Toriyama character design always struck me as Android 18 + Ah! My Goddess' Belldandy.
I think my guess was right, for some reason. Call it the ability to recognize subtle hints, or something. That and the elf chick... that's kind of redundant, we'll just call it Elf from now on. So Elf is waiting for me outside, and leads me toward the southeast where there's a tiny little cottage sitting by itself. It's almost quaint...

Since we all know that it is Nerf or nothing, I'm assuming it's Nerf.
in a demonic wizardry sort of way... Which in all fairness can be quite quaint. Speaking of witches... did ya get the little play on words there? SUBTLE! Anyway, there's a witch in purple here, and she seems to see us as well, which is great, and she let's us spend the night, which is also great. Either in the morning, or in the middle of the night, we get up and she's standing behind the crystal ball in the last picture. It's either crystal, or Nerf, but I can't tell.

She asks us a question that I'll have to guess is if we like potatoes, so I obviously answer yes. There's a bit more dialogue, and then Elf joins the party!... At least on paper, I think.

Yay, another target!
It is definitely traveling with our party, but it won't involve itself in any combat, nor do they appear with is in a town. I guess we're looking for some sort of location they'll open up for us? Something like that, and I don't care as long as I can go item shopping soon. Also, while we're at the old ladies house, I notice a well and decide to check it for valuable loot...

If trapped treasure chests weren't bad enough, now we have Monster-in-a-WELL!?
That is not loot. That is not loot at all, and I know because I've seen loot before, and it sounds really pretty when you play it!... No, damn it, that's a lute. I always get those things mixed up, as well as thousands of other semi-humorous things, which you'll hear about as this game goes on. You'll probably hear that joke again, too, so you may want to start keeping a score sheet.

That thing was actually pretty tough, now that we're back on topic. I did manage to beat it, but it was doing about 35 damage a hit to my party members, and that's more than half of our hit points, I think... it's definitely a number, at the very least.

Inside of the well, I find a man with horns on his hat.

I've never figured out what the deal is with those guys.
I've seen a lot of them around, so I guess I'll assume it's some sort of religious thing, and ignore it. Remember folks, that's the best way to handle other religions. If someone seems strange to you, ignore them, and go on about your business. Chances are you'll both be better off than you would be if you started yelling.

Too bad I'm a ghost, and can't talk to him.

Time to find the McGuffin, which I've described before, I think... Not what I'm looking for, I mean what a McGuffin is. I still don't know what in the blue blazes I'm looking for, but I'll bet it has something to do with this.

'The McGuffin is what the spies are after but the audience doesn't care.' -Alfred Hitchcock
It's either a cave, or the world's largest boomerang. If it is, I hope one of my party members can equip it. It would kill EVERYTHING!

... Nope, it's a cave. Damn. It's also a fairly big cave, full of a lot of things worth noting. Like these guys...

Toriyama draws great horrid little things.
They look like little, winged Namekians, for you Dragon Ball Z fans out there. I guess given that, I'll call them Slimey God Mothers, because I think there's some connection between Namek and snails. Also worth note is that these guys hit you with very damn powerful magic, which hurts like hell, and also they have a bad habit of appearing with babbles, which poison me, and I still don't know how to cure that.

Then there's these things:

Their actual name is slightly punny too: Baby Goyle.
Which looks like some sort of devil, with a fork, or possibly a rake. I guess this is your garden variety demon, *badoom tss!* That was a rim shot, by the way... which is a comedy thing... shut up.

And these guys, who I just can't decide if they're cute or not.

That is exactly what they are, yes.
I think they're slime knights... If not, then that's what they are now. I haven't played a DQ game all the way through since Dragon Warrior 1, for the NES, and the rest is all a vague gaming blur.

After that encounter, I ran into these bastards right here:

Hell Hornets. Still not as scary as the Asian Giant Hornet, because that actually EXISTS.
They're not really that hard, they're just bastards because they seem to like attacking the weakest party member, and do so relentlessly. They also show up a LOT, so I'm going through a lot of what I guess are potions... Wait, in DQ, it's herbs, isn't it? So I'm going through a lot of guys named Herb.

Also:

Those bastards will steal the fuck out of your MP.
Those fuckers are frightening, and when they attack their heads spin around in a circle in a very, very unsettling manner. I'm lucky that none of them hit, but I'm going to guess that because they don't, it means they're really, really strong, and should be avoided. Yes, that statement does actually make sense, if you game a lot.

Boss!
Ah, I think I've stumbled upon a plot point. I think I'm supposed to get/collect/drink/drown in that water in that pot, but as it turns out...

His name: Bloody Po.
McJagger is there, and doesn't want me to have it. Huh, I guess it's heroin in that pot.

Now, this guy was pretty tough, so here's the strategy I used, seriously this time, so you can see it from my perspective.

He has attacks that do damage to me, and I don't know what they are. So for the Hero I cast the other spell. It's the other spell, because it isn't the one that says 30 hp in the description. It lowers him by 25 every time I cast it... 25 what? I don't know, but it lowers it by 25, and makes me do more damage, so we'll go with defense. Meanwhile, George is using the thing to the right of the first option, which does the same amount of damage as his normal attack, I think, or possibly a little more. Either way, it doesn't much. then, I do that till I beat him, healing as needed.

Taadaa!

I beat him, so I guess I go back to the witch's house? Might as well, since I'm still a ghost.

So, uhhh... yeah...

Losing half your money sucks, but as a dungeon exit strategy? I've seen worse.
The exit didn't go so well, since we had used all of our healing items and MP getting in, and the hero and George were both poisoned. THANKFULLY! it seems you're just thrown back to your last save point with half of your money, which means that I still made it out with the whatever the hell!

Her name is... Granmarz?
Hooray, we have undergone the ancient... not dead... ness, ritual! And now, It's time to go and seriously fuck up a conniving bitch's day, in town.

We'll be back for that tomorrow, though, since the lobsters are breaking down the doors as we speak, and I'll need to get to the butter to fight them off. See you all tomorrow, hopefully... OH GOD, PINCHY!

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