We don't always like being nonplussed

Friday, July 22, 2011

Dragon Quest VII/6 - Day 12 (heat stroke makes for poor cognatious thunk.)

And once again, we find ourselves here on a Friday!

I guess I'll start out by saying that I have no gods damn clue where to go, and I'll feel no shame in not wanting to spend the entire session finding out where we're supposed to be right now. That given the case, we're going for an extremely long shot here, and we're going to head back to the town where we got George, since I think this might have been a mission, or something.

Well balls, I'm not sure how to get home from here, to be honest. I know that there's some item I have that warps me places... I don't know what item it is, now that I stop to think about it. Does someone have a teleport spell?

Ruura, AKA Return/Zoom! This was the first game where the cost was wisely reduced to a single HP.
Someone has a teleport spell, and it is not a helpful teleport spell. Guess I'll just take the first option, and see what's going on...

AHA! It was the first option, even though I didn't know that and so went to every other option at least twice! HA, I'm dumb! Anyway, the first option takes us back to the ruined temple, palace thing, and there's a well in the basement which takes us back to the real world. From there we just head... I think it's west, to some place!

It's a cave... did we come from a cave? Well we're heading in, so I hope that we came from a cave. Some of it does seem familiar, and I recognize the monsters. I'll assume this is the right way, but I could have sworn there was a flume... was this the cave with the flume? Probably not, because we make it out the other side, and to the small church which I remember from earlier.


Yup, it's the other Reidock/Somnia.We're back at the kingdom with the king that we may or may not work for, who might or might not have sent us out to get that mirror thing. I'm going to put on my thinking cap here and guess that for some reason the mirror is needed to break a curse? Well, we'll see at some point down the line. I like making these little guesses, to see when I'm wrong or right.

So it's back to the castle to speak with the royal hiney, and I'm pretty sure that it was the right place now.
Don't you wish you got narration in your life when you were going the right way?
That's the void of exposition, and I've come to know it well. Utter nothingness, with language that means nothing to me. This is what it's like to be blind in a foreign land, folks. Except with text, I mean.

When oblivion fades away, I find the party is now standing in...

'Okay meatshields, here's the plan.'
A war room? It's either that or the most boring library in the history of the world.

After a moment, a blond man runs in and says something to us excitedly, which I guess means follow him. That's fine, except I don't know where he told me to go, so it's time to wander all over again.

Ah, never mind, it's a linear path right to the throne room! You know, normally I hate games that get us stuck in a linear path, but given the fact that I still don't speak Japanese, in spite of my staring really hard at the screen in an attempt to spontaneously learn it, I appreciate the straight line.

Anyway, up the stairs to the throne room, and the king is:

'Somebody fetch the royal coffee!'
either dealing with one hell of a migraine, going insane, or both. That or crying, but he's a king and that would make a really bad impression.

Ok, that's one hell of a migraine. And I mean epic level migraine, because:

'And the royal exhaust fan!'It lit up the castle:

Not sure which royal appliance you'd want for this.Blasted us across the room:

Ah, this has to be the work of Ra's Mirror.
And turned the king into a woman. This is the sort of migraine that god gives you when he hates you, and wants you to know it.

And that's the work of... Ra's Tranquilizers?
And then, she fell over. I just felt the need to show you all this entire scene, because I had NO idea what was going on the first time through, and had to reset to go and do it all over for the images. Normally I'm pretty good at grabbing them, but this just managed to catch me so off guard that I was staring at the screen, dumbfounded.

Another exposition void, and we find ourselves:

I always suspected the catfish of subterfuge.

standing at the end of a bed, watching the woman-king sleep. You know, there are a lot of places where you can go to jail for that, so I'd guess that since we're not, she's not the real king... which begs the question, if she's an anomaly, why is she in the king's bed, instead of a hospital, or more likely, a prison? These are some of the great questions of our time, like why the catfish is actually a squirrel in a tiny submarine, or how much beef stew could a woodchuck chuck (eleven kilojoules).

Anyway, question marks and exclamation points are flying wild in the air, because obviously this is all very startling, and they have the punctuation to prove it.

So are all the people who used their local weather to 'disprove' Global Warming back in winter worried now? Of course not.
And now, Queen King has joined the party. This also seems reasonable, given the fact that their king has disappeared, they don't know where (Or maybe they do? It's in Japanese, still, in spite of my asking politely), and decided to let the person go. Sure, why not?

On this note, I'm afraid that I'm going to have to call it, because right where I'm sitting it's 103 degrees, and there's a computer's processor fan blowing at me, as well as a large heat generating monitor. In other words, my dear readers, I'm actually about to pass out from the heat, and I don't think that my brain cooking would in any way improve my vocabulary, vernacular, or thinky did.

Take care, and we'll be back next week!

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