We don't always like being nonplussed

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 48 (Wait... which me am I?)

And we've returned, and I guess what I'm supposed to be doing, is looking for myself. Dragon Quest has taken a philosophical turn that in retrospect, I should have seen coming a mile away.

Since I can't find me anywhere in the town, I think I should be looking in the mountains... And now I discover something I probably missed at the start of the game. There are little dirt paths that let you drop down from one level of the mountain to another! Which lets me get to a chest that I've been trying to get to for ages!

I think the jump is in front of the graves on the hillside...
At this point it's probably not even worth going back to the other world to look for these, but I'll take these since I'm here.
Tiny medal in hand, I begin scouring the rest of the mountain for any more of those paths, to see if I'm hiding down one of them. I've got to admit, I'm kind of a pussy, and I'm looking forward to eating my soul, or whatever it is that I'm doing with me.

I take a path on the upper right, which drops be down by a cave that I don't think I'd even noticed before. Once inside, I quickly find the me I'm looking for:

Stop me! I'm trying to take all the treasure before I can get to it!
Apparently there's something really fucking interesting about that wall, because I'm looking at it really intently. I wonder if it's made out of chocolate. It looks like it's made of chocolate, a bit. If you hadn't gathered, I could really go for some chocolate right now.

In a show of my true priorities, I make a direct line for the chests. Tiny Medal stashed in my inventory, I then go back to talk to myself. I don't seem that surprised to see me, which kind of makes sense. This is like talking to a slightly more active mirror, that's also a total coward... Come to think of it, there's a pretty big trend of mirrors in this game.

...someone's calling for their brother? This could get weird.
Well it looks like things suddenly became really exciting for some reason, and maybe it's because we just told him we would be eating his... our soul? Though I hate to spam a large number of similar images, I think that this calls for it.

I don't know how you got past the monsters, but would you like to join the party?
A small child runs into the cave to find us. Now, I'll even be willing to accept the redheaded girl that was wandering the area on top of the mountain, because she's an adult woman and can take care of herself; but this is a small child, who not only had to run through a monster-infested area to get here, but had to JUMP OFF OF A CLIFF! Dear lord, what the hell kind of parents just let their kids do this stuff? I mean, I know I jumped off of a few things and hurt myself when I was 16bit, but this kid just jumped... You know what? Never mind.

After the child speaks to me and myself for a while, I then run to the left side of the screen and jump down a pit... Then so does the child. I follow after me and him, and find that this is an even BIGGER drop than the last one, being at least four stories. Like I said, I'm giving up on trying to figure out how the kid didn't liquify on contact with the ground.

I guess there's trouble in town, or something, because we've got battle music on the over world map this time. Back to town we get, and when we walk in we see:

I forgot about the EGL goddess.
Yep, that's fire. I can't help but feel that this is the end result of living in sin with a cow, but I'm not one to pass judgement... It was EGL goddess that did this, and personally I think that she chose wisely.

Actually Dragon Quest isn't too big on the Killing-God-Games plot. There's a sparring match at the end of Dragon Warrior VII...
It seems that she sent monsters to wander around the town well in circles. This is the work of a wise and just goddess, but we're going to kill the hell out of these things. Because we just don't like gods, and thwarting their plans is fun.

No clue what the names mean.
Well, that's a new one. The one on the right does look brand new, and I haven't got the slightest fucking clue what it could be. It looks like some sort of lizard centaur that's wearing a diaper on it's front half? I guess that's it, but fuck that's a mutant-looking fucker.

Wow, so those monsters are actually kind of strong. I guess I've fallen behind on job or class levels, and should have taken the time to level up something or other more than I have. Well, time to find me and ignore the dying towns people!

We'll leave you two to not-talk whilst we kill monsters.
There I am!

The girl seems very confused to see me and I in the same room, but neither of them really react at all, and I can't fuse with myself. I guess that I have to go and track down all of the monsters, then kill them... freaking awesome.

Good God, these fuckers are everywhere.

Fight on, cow man! Fight on with the power of creepy love!
And disturbingly enough, that guy is fighting just about the fiercest of anyone I've seen here. I guess that you just have to do what you have to do for the sake of love?... I really wish I could let the monsters kill this guy, but the plot won't mooove without him. Get it? Because he fucks the cow.

After we've beaten way, way more enemies that we had any right to, and lost I'd say about sixty percent of our current party MP, we head back to the house to see if we can fuse with me, only to find me in a battle with a thing.

Get him, me! I'll be right there to help me!
I stop to speak with me, and he asks me something, I say yes, yadda yadda yadda... Wait... Is this it?

Hooray, fusion at last!
Holy crap, we're fusing! We're fusing! We're... Wait, I'm fusing with him? Does that mean he's a stronger me, or something? Well... what the hell? I mean, he's a total coward, but I guess he's fighting for love, or some shit like that. Time to ignore the hell out of repercussions, and fight me a:

Maybe we fused in such a way that we have four arms too? No? Aww...
Ripoff of a He-Man villain... Alright, whatever, sure. Let's just kill it and stop thinking about how retarded it looks.

OK, retarded as it may look, this guy packs a fairly decent punch, and it looks like he's totally immune to magic. My advice is to buff and attack, because he doesn't have a lot of hit points, and that's sure as hell in your favor here.

And that's it. We beat the monster, and the fire all goes away, and now it's day... I've got to admit, that is pretty much the goal of any boss fight. Making everything better. Though the girl seems rather upset that I ate me, but I'm just upset that the me that ate me wasn't the me I wanted to eat me, so now I'm a different me than I was, possibly. [AD note: Whut?]

I'm going to go lay down. We'll be back with more for Wednesday!

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