We don't always like being nonplussed

Friday, December 30, 2011

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 49: Almost There! And a Question!

"Ever play a video game and there was an incidental character you just liked so much?"

First thing that comes to mind for me is the kid who wants to be a blitzball when he grows up in Final Fantasy X.

Monday, December 26, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 46: Aw, Dammit!

I was watching Isstvan82 go level-grinding today, so I know he's preparing for tonight's Pokemon recording.

Merry Christmas!

As usual I'm late for these things, but I hope everybody had a great Christmas! It was a great day, but since most of the greatness wasn't game-oriented, let's keep this materialistic: I got a bunch of fun stuff off of PSN, like Wizardry: Labyrinth of Lost Souls, and the port of Sonic CD with all the fun additions. Isstvan82 snagged a copy of Dragon Age Origins Ultimate Edition, and AngeliqueDaemon is finally going to pick up Alice: Madness Returns.

Video games have always been an important part of our Christmas here. Christmas 1988 is probably the record-holder for best: our parents lucked out and hit Toys R Us at just the right moment, and we got Super Mario Bros. 2, Zelda II: The Adventure of Link, and Castlevania II: Simon's Quest all at once. And this was the year of the famous Nintendo chip shortage to boot! Final Fantasy was always big on Christmas too: we got FF VI, VII, Tactics, and X all for Christmas- the latter three cases because somebody was generous enough to bestow the newest Playstation console upon us. Winter's a good time to be playing through a nice, dense RPG- here in Maryland you sure don't want to be outside for most of it.

Since I'm here, it's a good time to mention that most of the TF Radio Network is on break for the rest of the year; there's some fun clip episodes coming up this week, but otherwise expect us to reconvene in January and pick up where we left off. Likewise Figurereviews.com has been on a special kind of break called "Busy as hell and with Photographers' Block" for the last couple weeks. This should hopefully be coming to an end soon as well. Meanwhile, Final Fantasy IV and Pokemon Gold continue apace, and the other project I've been working on is coming along. I'm hoping to show that around in January.

So, that's about it! If you've got a great game-related Christmas haul, past or present, don't be shy about letting us know in the comments!

Friday, December 23, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 45: Old Dude, Saved!

A double-size Friday dose of Pokemon Gold!

Pokemon Gold Part 44: Damn Gingers!

I was never a fan of Gilligan's Island as a whole, so I can't speak as to why Isstvan82 is singling her out.

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Monday, December 19, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 41: Aw, Crap

Found Isstvan82 a Pokemon Emerald strategy guide at Goodwill today! This is apropos of nothing, but it's a find I'm very happy with.

Friday, December 16, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 40: Convusion!

...which is either "confusion" mistyped, or some confusing form of convulsion. Either way, it's Friday, so have a double-length video!

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 38: Out of the Cave!

And here's today's installment of Pokemon Gold, since I posted yesterday's earlier!

Pokemon Gold Part 37: Into the Caves!

Sorry we're late, but we've got two posts for today to make up for it! Here's the first one:

Monday, December 12, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 36: TM or HM? I DON'T KNOW!

Isstvan puzzles through his inventory list and takes on another Gym!

New Soundwave 107: Skyrim, Xbox 360 TV, and the Kinect is WATCHING YOU

Sorry I haven't posted this here in a couple weeks, but you can always go to http://www.tfradio.net or the TFRadioNetwork's YouTube Channel to catch up to New Soundwave and a slew of great podcasts on comics, movies, Transformers, Power Rangers/Kamen Rider/Super Sentai/Tokusatsu and more!

Friday, December 9, 2011

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 33: Dangerous Old People!

The elderly are always to be watched out for in Japanese pop culture. When carrying sticks, doubly so. Which I'm fine with, since in so much of American pop culture people over 50 don't exist and/or are irrelevant.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Pocket Monsters Gold Part 32: BOX OF ROCKS!

GYM FIGHT!...after an insufferable sliding puzzle. Bah.

What the Hell are WE Playing!? Part 7: Finished!

The SNES Monopoly bloodbath comes to a close today! And the winner is... probably not much of a surprise if you've been watching up to this point.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 31: Birds Like Electricity?

It's Monday, which means we return to Pocket Monsters Gold!

What the Hell are WE Playing!? Part 5: Fatigue and Apathy

And since I went stupid and forgot to post it, here's part 5 of the Monopoly Saga!

What the Hell are WE Playing!? Part 6: So Close

Hasbro states that the longest game of Monopoly ever played was over 70 days long. We're nearing 2 hours here and are nearing the end, so the record is once again safe.

Friday, December 2, 2011

What the Hell are WE Playing!? Part 4: Starting To Miss Prison

Isstvan82 continues to play probably the worst game of Monopoly of his life against AngeliqueDaemon. Poor guy!

Pokemon Gold Part 30: Double-sized Friday Post!

Every Friday Isstvan82 records twice as much Pocket Monsters for your enjoyment!

Thursday, December 1, 2011

What the Hell are WE Playing!? Part 3: I fail

...the 'I' in this case being Isstvan82. AngeliqueDaemon did tell him she was going to kick his ass...

Pokemon Gold Part 29: More Ranting

Yay, ranting! Isstvan82 is good with the ranting (He said, the day a quote from him is the first thing up- extremely colorful, NSFW language there, by the way).

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

What the hell are WE Playing!? Part 1: Pennybags would be proud.

Well, we've given it way in the title, but come watch as AngeliqueDaemon and Isstvan82 go head-to-head in a game of Monopoly for SNES!

Pokemon Gold Part 27: God Damn it, Rocket!

Don't you hate blundering into long, involved events?

Monday, November 28, 2011

Friday, November 25, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 25: More Badges!

Isstvan82 disagrees with Treasure of the Sierra Madre re:stinking badges in today's double-length update!

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 24: Wooo!

...I think Isstvan82 may have done a bit better against Gym Leader #2 this time. Just a hunch. Happy Thanksgiving to our US Flailfans!

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 23: Failure

Isstvan82 goes up against another Gym Leader, and... well, you see the title.

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Video: What the Hell Am I Playing?

Today Isstvan82 has a special video of him playing an English-language game for once, that entirely mortal non-classic called... well, watch and find out!

Pokemon Gold Part 22: Pokemon is a Depressing Game

Welcome to the Tower, where you will beat the crap out of the ghosts of dead Pokemon.

Monday, November 21, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 21: The One Without the Subtitle

Isstvan82 didn't give us a subtitle for this one, so... enjoy!

New Soundwave 105: Skyrim, the Xbox at 10, and EVERY Riddler Trophy!?

This week on New Soundwave, we briefly talk Skyrim and other new releases, we talk the 10th anniversary of the Xbox, and Ender talks about getting every damn Riddler Trophy in Batman Arkham City. I am in awe of your patience, sir!

Friday, November 18, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 20: Big Friday I FEEL LIKE S**T!

Fortunately, it doesn't seem to be a cold. We've had three in as many months and I'm, er, sick of it.

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 18: Gold Digger

Isstvan82 blunders his way through the trivia contest and gets the Radio Card for his Pokegear!

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 17: Shopping!

Isstvan82 goes to the PokeMart! My usual shopping list: Potions, Pokeballs, a couple Revives, more Potions, more Pokeballs, and an Escape Rope.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 16: A new member

Pocket Monsters Gold keeps going! Since Pokemon doesn't have parties, per se, I'm gonna assume Isstvan82 caught something good.

Saturday, November 12, 2011

New Soundwave 104: Simpsons Arcade coming, and the Game of the 2000s Decade is...

...Shadow of the Colossus!? I mean, it's a pretty game from all I've seen, but... well, we get into that in the show. Enjoy!

Final Fantasy IV Part 15 (NO ONE expects the Beautiful Butterfly Inquisition!)

Funny that should be the title, seeing as AngeliqueDaemon has spent the morning collecting butterflies in Skyrim. Pretty game!

Friday, November 11, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 15: Bugs and Plants are so Similar.

It's true! They... both... occur in forests! Particularly Pokemon forests. Yeah.

Supersized Friday Video!

Thursday, November 10, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 14: Thanks for the Balls!

Isstvan82 continues his trek through Pocket Monsters Gold in Japanese! Being a teenager in the days of Pokemon and Dragon Ball Z (so often written "dragonballz" in those early days) was so much fun. You spent so much time snickering like a fool.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 13: I Hate Caves

Isstvan82 faces caves in Pokemon Gold! Allow me to describe the traditional Pokemon cave experience: Zubat, Zubat, Geodude, Zubat, Zubat, Zubat, Zubat, Zubat, Zubat, Zubat, maybe an Onix or a Golbat, Zubat, Zubat, Zubat.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 12: Sure Moron, I'll Kill Your Fish For You

Isstvan82 accidentally causes his Butterfree to forget its only useful move. Such is the nature of a Flailthrough. Luckily, he's fighting Magikarps.

Monday, November 7, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 11: Stupid Egg!

Today, Isstvan82 deals with the burden of Togepi and dreams of electric sheep.

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Friday, November 4, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 10: Big Friday Update!

Every Friday, Isstvan82 does a double-length chunk of Pokemon Gold! Watch and be amazed! Or at least amused! Hopefully!



Tomorrow: AngeliqueDaemon continues her Final Fantasy IV playthrough!

Thursday, November 3, 2011

New Soundwave 103: GTAV, Sonic Generations, and Skylanders is Evil Genius

New Soundwave is the TF Radio Network's video game podcast! This week:

-Batman: Arkham City- Nightwing sure is Batman again!(Just like Catwoman was.)
-Sonic Generations looks like it might actually be the elusive GOOD Sonic game
-The GTA V trailer
-Skylanders, and why as an insidious plan to get all your money it's positively brilliant.

Follow us on Twitter before Friday, 11/4/11 and you have a shot at winning a 4,000 Microsoft Point card!

Pokemon Gold Part 9: Birds are plants. Who knew?

Isstvan82 survives a minor save-game catastrophe and storms Sprout Tower!

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 7: Poke Dictator!

Isstvan82's Pokemon journey continues! And all I can think of when I see that title is Hitlerchu, an actual piece of fanart that... well, it's exactly what it say on the tin.

Monday, October 31, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 6: Trainers EVERYWHERE!

Isstvan82 catches the eye of many a Trainer in today's Pokemon Gold! At least now when Joey blathers about his damn Rattata, we can't understand him.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

New Soundwave 102: GTA V announced and Nintendo at a Loss

It's a good episode this week! We talk more Arkham City and how Christian Bale Batman sounds like Cookie Monster, Grand Theft Auto V, Nintendo's woes, and scary games in observance of Halloween!

And remember: we're holding a contest! If you follow New Soundwave on Twitter you'll be entered in a drawing for 4000 Microsoft Points!

Final Fantasy IV Part 12 (AngeliqueDaemon tells LIES!)

...or so she says in the title. But that could be a lie too! But if she's lying in the title about telling lies, then... man, it's a good thing I'm not a Star Trek evil computer, or right about now I'd be fried.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Final Fantasy IV Part 11 (Actually his name is Gilbert... and he still sucks)

Gilbert, Edward... he's the dude with the harp. And AngeliqueDaemon says he sucks. I'm not arguing.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 5: Welcome, Caterpie!

In a double-length slice of Pocket Monsters Gold, Isstvan82 is much kinder to Caterpie than Sentret...



Incidentally, it's been asked if Isstvan's playing this on an emulator. Well...


What do YOU think?


Thursday, October 27, 2011

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 3: We Have Pokedex!

Isstvan82 is exhorted to catch `em all in today's installment of Pocket Monsters Gold!

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 2: All The Damn PIDGEYS!

Pidgeys and Rattatas. Everywhere. And then, when you reach a cave, Geodudes and friggin' Zubats. Join us, feel Isstvan82's pain:

Monday, October 24, 2011

Pokemon Gold Part 1: It's SUPER... 2!

Today, Isstvan82 begins his next Flailthrough: Pocket Monsters/Pokemon Gold! Played on a Super Game Boy 2 no less!



This isn't our first Pokemon Rodeo! Previously, Isstvan82 played through Pokemon Black, and AngeliqueDaemon played through Pokemon Green! This is our first Pokemon Video- enjoy!

Sunday, October 23, 2011

Final Fantasy IV Part 10 (I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE Edward!)

Final Fantasy IV continues! You know, I get the feeling that AngeliqueDaemon doesn't like Edward/Gilbert... -Ed.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 Day 76: (The End!)

Isstvan82 wraps up Dragon Quest VI!



This Monday: Pocket Monsters Gold! That's Pokemon on this side of the world!

Thursday, October 20, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 Day 75: (Load-bearing Gremlin!)

The final battle rages on! Join Isstvan82 tomorrow for the final installment of Dragon Quest VI!

New Soundwave 101: Batman Arkham City, Pokemon Gray, and Batman Arkham City

It's a good conversation on AC as well, as Peter Van and John DeLuna clear up some important points for ExVee and me, such as "Does Catwoman control like a 200-pound man?" And Grand Theft Auto III is ten years old! Wow, am I ancient.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 Day 74: (Is dat some Final Boss!?)

The end of Dragon Quest VI approaches, and Isstvan82 is hacking his way there, both in the lung congestion and swordy senses.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 Part 73: (Still coughing)



Need to get caught up? Click the DQ6 logo in the sidebar or the DQVI tag at the end of the post to see the whole saga up to now!

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

New Soundwave 100: Daytona USA, Arkham City anticipation, and Dark Souls!

After a week's absence for family stuffs, I'm back! A great conversation ensues on game difficulty, Peter eagerly anticipates Arkham City, and Brian professes his undying love for Daytona USA.

Plus: Watch the episode to learn how you can win 1600 Microsoft Points!

Dragon Quest VI/6 Day 69- (Another escape!)

Monday, October 3, 2011

New Soundwave 098: Kindle Fire, and Merchandising!

Where the REAL money from the video game is made! (How the heck come Nintendo has so rarely gotten decent action figures, anyway? Don't let me down, Figma Samus!)

I was also on Radio Free Cybertron again this week! Check it out at the site at http://www.tfradio.net, and subscribe to the TF Radio Network on YouTube!

Dragon Quest VI/6 Day 62- (watch out for exploding balls!)

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

New Soundwave 097: PSN = no class action suits, Game Rentals, and more!

Sorry I didn't post this earlier! This past week we were rejoined by Peter Van and our regular host John DeLuna, much to ExVee's relief. Plus, my new camera arrived and actually functions!



Last week I was also on Radio Free Cybertron, the original Transformers podcast (and one of the internet's very first podcasts!) And this week I'm doing it again! Join us LIVE around 8:00PM EDT at http://www.tfradio.net/live, or follow @tfradio on Twitter and they'll let you know when the show starts! See you there!

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 59 (Oh crud)

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Final Fantasy IV Day 2 (Chasing the elusive butterfly of Kain)

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Final Fantasy IV Day 1 (My secrets! Let me tell you them!)

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 55 (fancy like pants)

News: Nintendo Legend is one year old today!

NintendoLegend.com – Eric Bailey has loved the 8-bit Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) video game console for over 20 years. Although he does enjoy picking up more titles, he has always been more of a player than a collector, preferring loose cartridges that he can actually push into the machine than any complete-in-box sets. He has a huge respect for such collectors, but a couple years ago, he had an issue when he was trying to research information on NES games he did not have and wanted to possibly try playing sometime.

He found that he was dissatisfied with the available reviews currently residing throughout the Internet. Nobody, not even certain NES experts, had a full set of trusted reviews available to browse. In fact, many sites that had a section specifically for NES reviews were woefully incomplete. But on sites with reviews for every title, like GameFAQs.com, the reviews varied wildly in their opinions, length, writing quality, factual legitimacy, and style. This was especially an issue for slightly obscure titles, where nobody could seem to agree on whether it was any good, nor could they express their opinion in clear terms.

Exactly one year ago, he began his mission to simply have one page on the Internet where all the NES titles were listed in alphabetic order, and each title had a review for it, with a rating score. Thus began the NintendoLegend.com project, which he often describes as “one crazy retro gamer's quest to write a quality review for every NES video game ever released in North America.”

In one year, that first review has been followed by over 150 more, and has truly become a labor of love. What began as a generic Wordpress blog and a new Twitter account has blossomed into a website with 8-bit flavor, a humble following, and a swell of new visitors through NES-related Google searches and links from more prominent websites such as NESGuide.com.

“The best part of it, probably, is the conversations I've had the privilege of having with fellow retro gamers passionate about the NES,” Bailey explained. “There's always been a great source of enjoyment in finding commonalities with people, and retro gaming is no exception. I've had a blast doing this, and I think people are really beginning to realize that I'm serious about building this library of what I hope to be a complete collection of informative, comprehensive, well-written, fairly objective, enjoyable-to-read NES game reviews. We'll see.”

Despite a couple significant hiatuses brought on by “real life” events, questions concerning his direction and techniques, and the occasional minor controversy or disagreement brought on by a review or Facebook post, Eric has consistently shown a commitment to a formula of simply posting NES reviews, one after the other, as a following gradually builds to see him through the entirety of the challenge and wish him the best.

----------

On a personal note, and speaking of wishing him the best, I want to both congratulate Eric on his first year anniversary, and thank him here for being the first site to link to Flailthroughs. We'd barely been around a month longer than Nintendo Legend, and knowing somebody was reading at that early juncture, before the numbers were proving it, was really heartening.

This is a man who is passionate about the NES and puts a lot of thought into his reviews, and watching him undertake this enormous project has been a real treat. Congratulations, Eric!

Monday, September 19, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 part 52: Right where we left off! (Video)

Thanks to Isstvan82/That Guy's diligent play and careful application of a Game Genie over the weekend, he's pretty much where he was Thursday evening! As he says, it's something we try not to do, but when you have to try and replicate 10 weeks of play over the weekend? Out comes the Game Genie.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

That Guy's other project! (And other name!)

No New Soundwave this week- scheduling conflicts. And we all had so much more to say about the 3DS this week too! And so little of it positive!

But assuming you're still in the mood for some video, we've got something for you- as well as a little announcement.


You might've noticed (or not) that all of That Guy's videos are hosted on a YouTube account by the name of Isstvan82. In case you didn't, check it out! The channel also plays host to his Minecraft videos- he's really been enjoying the game lately and decided to give some video playthroughs a try. This also seems a good opportunity to announce that henceforth, That Guy will be known as Isstvan82 here on Flailthroughs as well. New, less generic name, same great randomness and Crazy Shit he's known for.

Tomorrow, the DQVI video updates begin!

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Flail it Yourself: The Burden of Fu

A couple weeks ago we talked about how Fu, falling as it does in the H-family of sounds, stands in for Hu sounds in words like Hoop and Hood. But that's not all Fu has to do, no. Like Vu does for V-sounds, Fu is compounded with other characters to make the other F-sounds used in loanwords.

Final Fantasy would be the obvious choice... but they've used Romanized titles on their logos since almost the beginning. So instead have a look at the Fire Emblem logo:


In the distant past we covered how sometimes an elongated A sound is used for "er" sounds in English, and that's why the kana for "A" repeats in the word Fire. It's the same thing with the other vowel sounds, with a small E for Fe, a small I for Fi, etc... and of course a small O for Kamen Rider Fourze.

Friday, September 16, 2011

Dragon Quest VI Part 51: Tragedy Befalls That Guy (Video Post!)

Last night, the worst thing that can happen in an RPG happened to That Guy. I'll let him tell you all about it:



So starting Monday: all video updates for DQVI! See you then!

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 50 (But what Speed Racer doesn't know is that Racer X is his brother, Rex, who was presumed dead in a car crash)

And we're back. Sorry about the cutoff, but trust me when I tell you players aren't happy if the DM is playing a video game and ignoring them. That sort of thing leads to being stabbed with a pencil, and I do not enjoy that aspect of D&D.

Now, when we last left off we had searched the upper floor, and were going to make our way down to find:

I think they pretend to be asleep so they don't have to listen to the witch explain why she's here.
A lot of unconscious guards... Alright, that's none of my business, so off we go to find my flashback things. I'm starting to think my character worked in this castle, or something.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 49 (Holy department of backstory, Batman!)

And welcome back for Wednesday. I keep feeling like I should come up with some titles for them, like "Wacky Wednesday," or "Manic Monday," but to be honest, most of these things feel more like they should be labeled, "Terrible Tuesday," or "Fuck off Friday." Not that I don't enjoy doing it, I just think they would be more realistic that way.

So, when we last left off, I had done the fusion dance with myself, and we were kind of out of options on what to do. Since it seems to me that we've been to every town on the map, and we received no magic armor from finishing this quest, we're going to have to start going back to towns we know until we find some form of plot hook.

Off we go!

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 48 (Wait... which me am I?)

And we've returned, and I guess what I'm supposed to be doing, is looking for myself. Dragon Quest has taken a philosophical turn that in retrospect, I should have seen coming a mile away.

Since I can't find me anywhere in the town, I think I should be looking in the mountains... And now I discover something I probably missed at the start of the game. There are little dirt paths that let you drop down from one level of the mountain to another! Which lets me get to a chest that I've been trying to get to for ages!

I think the jump is in front of the graves on the hillside...
At this point it's probably not even worth going back to the other world to look for these, but I'll take these since I'm here.

Monday, September 12, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 47 (Oh, there I am...)

And we're back for Monday, where I've found something that looks pretty likely for our next location.

Now, I've passed by this area I don't know how many times, and I've thought that it was somewhere I've been before. I was right, it is... IN OPPOSITE LAND! That's what I've been thinking of the other world as, by the way.

That does look like the entrance to Lifecod/Weaver's Peak.
This looks a little like another mountain I've been to, so I passed by it like three times before I realized that this looks a lot like the mountain where you first start the game. I don't know if it is, but I'll assume that it's the right place to go, and if not delete this and you'll never know how dumb I am. Haha, suckers.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

New Soundwave 096: Dragon Quest X, The silly 3DS add-on, and Realism!

Great (if lengthy) show this week! ExVee, Brian and I talk about Monster Hunter Tri G and the accompanying 3DS analog pad add-on, exactly what the deal is with Dragon Quest X, and realism in video games being the enemy of fun. John and Peter are off this week due to schedule weirdness, but hopefully they'll be back next week to keep me from running off at the mouth...


Saturday, September 10, 2011

Flail it Yourself: V for Vexation (Conclusion)

As I mentioned last week, there are two ways to write loanwords with Vs in them with katakana. The other of these is a modified U kana, the default version of which is seemingly pronounced "Vu." In practice it's usually modified by a small vowel sound to become Va, Vi, etc. Take a look at  the Evangelion logo for a good example:




EDIT! It's been pointed out that the Evangelion logo's pretty stylized, which makes it hard to make out what I'm talking about. So have a look at the Valkyria Chronicles 3 logo too- that's much closer to stock katakana:


Despite this, an awful lot of Japanese creators still use the B family of sounds. Particularly for the letter V itself, which is nearly always written "Bui." Which comes off as pretty damn comical sometimes:



Bui! Bui! Bui! Bictory!

Friday, September 9, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 46 FRIDAY VIDEO SPECIAL! (We can't count.)

Starting today: Friday Video Updates! That Guy finally finds a cave. Sadly it's one of those infinite-loop caves with one way out.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 45 (I used to want a sword, but now I only want the chamber pot gone...)

And here we are again, it's always such a pleasure. Remember how I'm always fucking wrong? Oh how we laughed and laughed, except that I was raging. Under the circumstances I can't say that I've regrets.

Sorry, just finally got to finish Portal 2, and now that song is stuck in my head... forever. Where we last left off, we had finished searching the town, and now I guess we move on to the castle to look around... assuming that there is, of course, a castle.

Just keeping things moving until our blacksmith is done smithing, folks.
There is a castle, and as with any castle in the world, the second we walk up to the door they open it to let us in. I always love how royalty doesn't sweat the small stuff, like attempted assassination. I'll make sure not to to let them down in that department... unless, of course, I'd really like to shoot someone in the face-meats.

Right off the bat I think we're running into important people.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 44 (A metal sammich would hurt your teeth)

And today we're back, where we're entering the not-a-cave to the north... God damn it, I would have bet good money that it was a cave, and not a little shrine thing. I feel somewhat crestfallen, to be honest. I would have bet all of my years of video gaming that's what it would be.

Yay, cave!
Does... Does this still count? Seriously, I know what it was on the outside, but this is a real cave! It's a cave! Oh thank Toriyama, I feel like a weight has been lifted off of my nerdiness. I've been wrong about so much in this game, it's nice to get something right every once in a damn while.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 43 (Chasin' that lime green hobo, livin' that Dragon Quest dream...)

And we're back for Tuesday!

As I recall when we last left off, we had just had a close encounter with a bunny girl prostitute, and I guess it could be worse, because it could be one of the guys in the cowls with horns on them. Try not to think about it, just agree with me and we'll see what else we can find...

Monday, September 5, 2011

Dragon Quest X announced! (Should we be worried?)

Courtesy of Siliconera, here's everything known about the game so far! In short, it's going to be a lot like DQIX, but take things a step further in combat-system revision and multiplayer. The latter meaning that it'll have the online multiplayer Dragon Quest IX should've had. Yay! There's also some nifty new item-crafting options, and it's going to have enhanced graphics when played on Wii U. There's a beta test coming up, and I would probably give several key organs to get into it, but I'm not in the right place and lack the right region of Wii. Damn! I am happy that it's Classic Controller-compatible, as that's my Wii controller of choice.

...but as I write this, reports are coming in that the game may require an internet connection after the first few hours- which makes the rumor of a monthly fee a bit more credible. Guys, don't make a Dragon Quest I won't buy. You haven't done it yet, don't start now...

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 42 (Did I... did I just score?)

And we're back for Monday, and I think I've found something!

There's a town south of the temple we take between worlds, and the last time I found it while looking for a plot event, they kicked me out at the gate. This time however, things are a bit different!

Does anybody get in or out without this key item? How have they not starved to death in there?
I noticed that the guard mentioned the item that I got from the man in red in the snow church, and let me in! Of course I managed not to take a picture of him mentioning it, because I have stupid fingers, but I figured I'd throw one in there anyway. PROFESSIONALISM!

Sunday, September 4, 2011

New Soundwave 095: Zelda Skyward Sword and the PC/Console Game Divide

Once again the TF Radio Network presents New Soundwave! This week we talk Zelda: Skyward Sword, Call of Duty Modern Warfare 3, how much of the difference between console and PC games is real and how much is perceived, and Arkham City's Second Quest, among other topics! And of course don't forget to subscribe to TFRadioNetwork and check out http://www.tfradio.net!

So you want to get into Dragon Quest

You might've noticed that Dragon Quest is about to celebrate its 25th anniversary in Japan with an anthology of the Famicom and Super Famicom versions of its earliest games. 25 years is a long time for any series, and anything that sticks around that long gathers baggage- in this case nine mainline games, and at least twice as many spinoffs in Japan. So the most important part of that baggage is the part that's most difficult to address: where do you start?
You'd think this would be an incredibly easy question to answer, with two obvious, simple answers- which are both, in my opinion, wrong.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Flail it Yourself: V for Vexation (Part 1)

In all the Katakana stuff I've gone over, I can't believe I've forgotten V! V-sounds are another case of trying to emulate a sound in a language that isn't quite set up for it, but unlike a lot of others, there's more than one way to go about getting there.
The first of those, which we'll go over today is by using B sounds. Those are written with the addition of what looks like quotation marks to the kana for the H-family of sounds- ha-he-hi-fu-ho. (And we covered the Fu thing before.)

Ever wonder why the wee-est of the weeaboo call Vegeta "Bejita?" Well, because that's technically how it's spelled. On a more directly game-related subject, the Varia suit from Metroid? A mistranslation- it should be the Barrier Suit, which is painfully obvious looking at the Metroid II and Super Metroid artwork for Samus's armor with and without the Varia. It's another layer of armor, a barrier. When I started learning katakana this was one of those slap-myself-on-the-forehead moments- so obvious! Once you know what you're looking for, anyway.

Friday, September 2, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 41 (Fucking ice puzzles!!!)

And we're back for the big Friday update!

When we had last left off, we had just changed an entire town full of snowmen into people, and I had learned that the item shop here sucks ass. But there's another cave for us to explore, so we'll head up there and take a look after we're done looking through town.

Apparently everyone was frozen for fifty years. All you had to do was talk to the ice princess, old guy!
Old dude seems really insistent on the number fifty, which I guess is how long the town was frozen? I'm not sure, but he does seem grateful, which is always nice. Shame, because if it was frozen for fifty years, that means he probably got through his twenties by feeling up ice sculptures. I hate to think what those people found caked to them when they thawed. I'll give you a hint. It was waffles. Because sadly, if I found an entire town full of frozen people, I probably would just stick waffles to them.

I've also found another person that seems somewhat important.

His name is Zam. Whether he's related to Disgaea 2's Yukimaru or Gundam's bipedal space-turnip the Big Zam, I cannot say.
It's a fat guy in red, but he asks us a question, as you can see. I say yes, and he talks quite a bit about what it probably something of great importance. As I still haven't learned Japanese, I smile and nod politely to him and then make my way out of town and head to the northern most cave.

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 40 (Cold as a witch's testicles)

And we begin our Thursday update by looking for more new and strange things! I did manage to find something fairly easily, and not too far from where we got that nifty armor yesterday. I was scouting out the area, or at least the bottom left quarter of the map, when I found this interesting place:

This Significant Plateau(TM) provided by...
Is this the only place on the planet it snows? Probably, but let's not question it out of hope that it's what we're looking for, kay?

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 39 (Yeah, I was right...)

And we're back. Sorry about the abrupt cutoff, but I had to wax the ostrich. Thank god we have a professional ostrich waxer, or it would take forever!... Seriously though, scrubbing the shower out sucks.

Anyway, where were we?

New Soundwave 094: The SNES at 20, Sonic CD, and finishing games

Forgot to post this earlier in the week! Thanks a lot, Irene.

It was a good show this week: I get all gushy over the SNES and we talk about why people don't finish games as much as they used to. And... get ready for this... my video?

It WORKS!

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 38 (Nothing good can come of this...)

And we're back, and I spent a good bit of time just trying to figure out where I'm supposed to go. Luckily, I ran into a tired old man, at about hour 3.

Karuhe: 'KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!'
I'd talked to this guy before, so I hadn't expected him to do or say anything, but to be honest I was getting desperate, and figured anything was worth a try. I don't know what he just gave me, but I can't find those symbols in my inventory, and had to resort to trying everything I have... For the second time today.

It was, however, totally worth it.

Monday, August 29, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 37 (BOOBIES!!!!!!!)

And we're back after a weekend with no electricity! Well, not a whole weekend, just enough to screw up any plans I had for playing this thing ahead of time to figure out what to do next, so I had to spend most of the time since it came back figuring out what the hell I do. I'm taking a long shot, here, but I think I've got it.

That map's filling out nicely!
I've found this location on the map, along with a few others that could be important, but this one sticks out. Why? Because you can only get to it from under water, and that's the gimmick I'm working with for the moment. See, under the sea:

Sunday, August 28, 2011

Naruto Shippuden: Nultimate Impact. Demo.. AKA Dynasty Warriors: Nult Wrap Up

Sorry for the delay guys. Hurricane Irene knocked out our power last night, and it didn't come back on until like 5 today... and then I had to actually get a few hours' sleep. I know, I'm weak... Anyway, on with the show!

Alright, today we're checking out versus mode. Let's hope there's an option to play against the CPU, because I don't want to try to connect to someone in Japan that's been level grinding and can horribly, horribly rape me. I get the same six tutorial screens and then some text boxes... god I hope it's not telling me it's connecting to the internet... Ah well:

Now that the power's back...

...expect AngeliqueDaemon to post the rest of her Naruto Shippuden: Ultimate Ninja Impact demo review later tonight! I'm actually pretty pleased we only lost power for about 15 hours; last time a hurricane came up this way we lost it for an entire week. So, back with postings soon!

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Naruto Shippuden: Nultimate Impact. Demo.. AKA Dynasty Warriors: Nult

And I'm back again... and more to the point it's really me, AngeliqueDaemon. Why am I back again? Because I was told this game is essentially Dynasty Warriors: Naruto. I cannot stress how AWESOME this could possibly be. I mean THINK about it... you could play your favorite character, and just run around and CRUSH other ninjas! I mean, I know that this isn't an official Dynasty Warriors game, but it could be soooooooo cool... running around... as Hinata... being all shy and underrated and shit... and then KICKING UNHOLY AMOUNTS OF ASS!!!!

Honestly I'm trying to keep my expectations down, because there's a good chance that reality won't be able to live up to the amazingness dwelling in my head, and I'm having a hell of a time not saying something stupid like 'There's no way they could mess this up' because there really, REALLY is... Shit, does that count as saying it? Anyway, on with Dynasty Nult!

Friday, August 26, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 36 (In which the Spice must flow)

And we're back for the big Friday update, which might turn into the Friday Video update, if we get a consensus on the matter. It stands at one vote for yes, so I guess that could be a consensus. Remember to vote yea or nay, depending on your opinion.

So, we were going to go to the new town to see what we can find, and then do our best to figure out where to go from there.

This might be one of the other seven hundred places excitable amateur archaeologists have mistaken for Atlantis.
Not at all what I pictured Atlantis looking like, but I guess you have to take what you're given.

This place certainly does seem festive, if nothing else. There are pretty sparkling colors in the air, so there are either some really wacky fire flies around here, or it's something to do with magic.

Thursday, August 25, 2011

New Poll: How about more video?

On Wednesday, That Guy celebrated our first anniversary (+/- 10 days) with his first video! Which you can see at the end of this post- just click here!

So our question is: want more? Vote to the right, and the poll lasts for one week, until the end of September 1st. If you've got any other comments or suggestions, put them here or email me at flailthroughs@gmail.com!

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 35 (Apparently in Dragon Quest it's NOT hard to find jobs...)

And we're back for Thursday, and I for once don't know what to do first! It's so exciting to have too many ideas where to go! Do we speak with King Spongebob, or do we head to the other world and check out that island/ town that came up out of the water? I think the first thing to do is going to be speaking with the king, to see if we get a reward.

Actually no, I think the first thing I'm going to do is switch out my two magic users for the other two, and get them some job levels. I figured out how to do this totally by accident, and I figured it was time to level them up.

Ok, on second thought that might not be the best idea, because they're both about 10 levels behind the rest of us, and neither of them have healing magic. I settled on this configuration, for the sake of not dying.

So, George/Carver/Hassan, Elf/Milly/Mireille, Casper/Ashlynn/Barbara, and uh... Hero/Hero/Hero.
So we settle on having Casper in the group for a while, so we can get her some job levels.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Our First Anniversary! (...was Sunday a week ago. Of course!)

Flailthroughs went live on August 14th, 2010. Which means we've been at this for a little over a year now! Our goal from the beginning has been a simple one: we wanted to share the entertaining confusion we've always felt playing import games without anything close to a working knowledge of Japanese. I think we've managed that so far, and learned some valuable lessons along the way. (First and foremost: never, ever play Saga games in Japanese.)

Over the past year, we've done in-"depth" playthroughs of seven going-on eight games, including one of the first and least helpful complete runthroughs of Pokemon Black to appear online! More than that, we've provided some potentially legitimately valuable help with some of the weird ways that the Japanese language handles loanwords, as well as demo reviews, quick overviews of obscure import titles, and even reviews of even more obscure RPG Maker games (on those occasions when homebrew games in foreign languages and my PC decide to get along).

Most importantly I'd like to thank AngeliqueDaemon and That Guy for supporting me in this madness, and putting far more time and effort into powering through the games they've reviewed than any sane person would, or should. Thanks, guys! I'd also like to thank everyone who's supported us and linked to the site, especially Eric Bailey of Nintendo Legend fame who's been a booster of ours from very early on. Thanks! And of course, my thanks to everybody who supports us just by reading us- if nobody did, what would be the point?

We've worked some of the kinks out of the operation and discovered even more new ones as we've expanded and tried new approaches. All a part of not really knowing what we're doing, which- whether anyone wants to admit it or not -is a big part of life. The trick is to laugh about it, and fix it where you can.

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 34 (In which I can't make the DAMN AUDIO MATCH!!!)

And welcome to the belated one year anniversary flail. This is going to start out pretty straight forward, but should get better at the ending, so bear with me.

We take the first set of stairs down, grabbing a few chests on the way, one of which has a Tiny Medal, which is good... I still don't know where to take them, but at least I've got a good amount of them by now... I think.

I can tell right away that I'm going to absolutely hate this place:

Very mazeish.
Yep, I'm going to hate it here.

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 33 (Witty Title Goes Here)

And back on Tuesday, I still haven't managed to get my email back, so I'm going to be doing this from AngeliqueDaemon's account again. It's odd to think that while this is posted, I have a vagina. [Ed note: It's only on loan.]

Now, I don't know where I'm going, but I'm still going to guess that it's underwater, since the king of sponges was too. I'm going to keep my eyes open for unusual formations under the sea, and hope for the best.

If houses and whole kingdoms are fine underwater, what do we need this bubble for?
That is most definitely an unusual underwater formation, but only because the singles clash so much with the color scheme. Also, it's a house, under water. That's pretty goddamn unusual, so I'm going to step in and see if I don't have to battle... a drowned person, or something.

Monday, August 22, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 32 (I WILL LEARN YOUR SECRETS OF KRABBY PATTIES!!!!)

[Foreword: Thanks to some douche rocket in Taiwan, That Guy's Google account has been locked down, so he can't post this under his own. Until we get all that mess sorted out, we'll be posting these under my account, though I assure you it's still him writing and not me. Sorry for the confusion.]

After a long weekend of helping a friend clean out his basement, we're back and smell vaguely of cat pee. I didn't have a time to do anything over the weekend, which would have been the best place for power leveling, but friends is friends, and you help where you can.

I did at least spend a good amount of time wandering around the map, and so I've found somewhere that looks like a good starting point for our magical mystery tour of insanity.

That looks promising.
Ok, in reality I was teleporting around randomly, hoping to find where I go next, and saw this cave from outside of the castle where we met George. It still counts, though!

I love this part of JRPGs. Seriously, I do. -Ed.
I'm not supposed to be here! I am NOT supposed to be here! Run away! Run away fast!

Sunday, August 21, 2011

Demo Review: Carnage Heart EXA (PSP) Conclusion!

And in the time between Part 1 and now, I caught That Guy's cold. Hooray! Unlike That Guy who gets comically incoherent when set upon by plague germs, I get cranky and judgmental. Just so you know. Punch it, Chewie:

Yesterday, a young, possibly-disabled creep named Kairu (me, the player. Hooray.) has hired a girl named Chirin to tutor him in the ways of programming robots (Overkill Engines or OKEs, if you want to keep up on the jargon). When they met, he was struck dumb by Chirin's enchanting unremarkable mousiness. I mean, seriously, she's plain. Not even "plain" in that teen drama "Oh my god I pulled her glasses off and she's a freaking goddess" kind of way. She's average. In the real world she might be on the high side of average, since the real world allows fat people like myself in capacities other than comic relief. But for a world where impossible anatomy and hair colors exist and body fat does not? She is double average.

What followed was what felt like several decades' worth of dating sim-style conversation and dull-but-actually-helpful (even to a non-speaker of Japanese) tutorials administered by Chirin, and later by Partita, Kairu's "assistant." Exactly what she assists him with is up for debate, as she's a robot designed to look like a young woman wearing a maid costume. To reiterate: Japan. Kairu is a bit scruffy but I don't see why he'd have a problem meeting women... he doesn't seem to type to suddenly exclaim "Hoyvin Glavin!" (Or, en Espanol, "Hoibin Maibin") He'd do okay, provided he left the robot maid home. And women in Carnage Heart-verse seem pretty forgiving, as Chirin was merely surprised by the fact that he lived alone with an animate Real Doll, and not utterly repulsed as I'd think any self-respecting woman would be. Maybe there's no stigma attached to this in this world. Perhaps she's got one at home, and she's hoping she can set him up on a date with Partita. I don't know how these fictional people think, man.

Saturday, August 20, 2011

New Soundwave 093: 3DS sales in Japan, Sonic Generations, More!

Fun conversations on the 3DS and how ease of programming helped its predecessors, and whether Sonic Generations will be the legendary "Good" modern Sonic game. (Probably not.) You can also hear me wonking my way through the most generic description of Dr. Strange as a character ever recorded, and my camera still refuses to work. Shock!

As always, be sure to check out the TF Radio Network for previous episodes of New Soundwave as well as podcasts on just about any sufficiently geeky subject you can think of!




Demo Review: Carnage Heart EXA (PSP)

We've got another PSP demo this weekend! There's a variety of reasons I decided to go this route: one is that I want more current material on the site to complement our retro activities- there's actually less of a barrier to import gaming on consoles now than there has been since the days of the Super Famicom. (Meanwhile, Nintendo has region-locked their portables. Way to be behind the times, guys!) Another reason is that Japanese RPG Maker games are a bit harder to run successfully on a non-Japanese OS than I predicted them to be. Between that and my constant video errors on New Soundwave, I REALLY do not want to be developing a reputation of being bad with computers.

So I found a list of Japanese PSP demos somewhere, and looked to see if there was anything that...

...holy crap. Is that a new Carnage Heart? It IS!

As we've established here and elsewhere, I Dig Giant Robots. Carnage Heart is a mech game, but it's a mech game of a type that I don't think has ever been attempted elsewhere. You design a mech- here called an Overkill Engine or OKE, because This Is Japan, And A Robot Cannot Just Be A Robot. And then you program it using a series of chips describing various actions and conditions for performing them. So it's a robot strategy/puzzle game. And it's hard. This was a game that gave me a tough time in English, so this ought to be fun. I have a soft spot in my heart for developer Artdink -not because of  their goofy name, or any of their own games (though No One Can Stop Mr. Domino is bizarre fun, just like CH), but because they were the ones who ported Tactics Ogre and Ogre Battle to Playstation, without which TO would never have been released in the US, or if so not until this very year.

So let's see what we can do.

Friday, August 19, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 31 (No energy, but still as big as we can make it!)

Alright, we're back for Friday and here to see what trouble we can get into!... Or at least figure out where we're supposed to be going, which is the next new step. I noticed this right by the kingdom we were just in, so I decide to find where I parked my ship, to see if we can go through.

Did the ship Zoom to wherever you were this far back? I forget.
As it nicely turns out, we can, so that works out for me just dandy. Now we just need to follow the coastline until we spot something that looks even remotely interesting!

Or until we reach a town that sucks us into a cut scene the moment we sail even remotely close to it, which works just as well.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 30 (Feelin sick, but still truckin.)

Potato.

Not quite to hallucinating yet, but swallowing is about as painful as one might expect it to be to swallow a pineapple, made of razorblades stuck into a salt-lick. But the way I figure it, we're all cucumbers, so we might as well enjoy a polka now and then. In to the tower thing we go!

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 29 (Dumb luck, and the plague.)

And we're back for Wednesday, and I hope you're enjoying actually knowing a plot hook as much as I am.

I guess I'm supposed to talk to the king about something, since he went to the throne room to look all official in his wife beater and mullet, so we'll speak with him and see if we can glean anything at all from his dialog.

Yup, there's 'Mirror' again.
Yep, there it is again! I'm noticing things! I wonder if I should have it in my inventory when I talk to him... That seems like it would be the smart thing, wouldn't it?

Yup! The Mirror of Ra is what was needed.
Yes, it looks like it was the smart thing, even though I forgot it was already there, since I had seen it once before.

Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 28 (Sweet Christ on a cracker, those need to die!)

And we're back. Once again we're faced with the problem of where to go, and to be honest I wrote up a lot of things that seem to be totally boring, uneventful dead ends. Here however is where it looks like I'm supposed to be, so we're going to go with it rather than boring you. Also, I don't know when I last saved, so.. Here goes nothing.

Monday, August 15, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 27 (Maybe your child died because his room is missing a WALL?)

And we're back gang, after a weekend of power leveling which took a goddamn long time, and didn't get us that far. I did manage to get a few new levels in the new classes I picked, but sadly we stopped getting those pretty quickly, so I guess that means it views the mobs we're fighting as too weak, I think. They're still kicking my ass, though.

Back to the mountain we go and I begin searching for the right path to take to the golden bafmodad, but I can't get too far because of these little bastards.

Before...
I can't get through them, and I'm wondering if I have to track down some sort of item that will... wait... What was the thing I got in the cave, again?

 ...and... After?
Yeah, I guess that was it, then... shit there's a lot of this cave I need to back track and look at. But that can wait till later!

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Final Fantasy Type-0 addendum: More info and good news!

So, thinking about trying the demo for yourself? Siliconera has you covered with a nice, comprehensive guide to FF Type-0. Now that her primary review is done I'm going to point AngeliqueDaemon to this so she can play without pulling her hair out. But the purity of the Flail must be preserved, and so she willingly remained ignorant on the finer points of the game. She has a lot of patience, as you may have noticed by now.

More good news: the game's director has already said that he promises to improve the camera for the finished game. That's a relief!

Demo Review: Final Fantasy Type-0 wrap up

Today's missions starts off with women in silly hats talking. I recognize both voices, but can't really place them... I think one's Sango, but don't quote me... HOLY SHIT WE GO RIGHT FROM CUT SCENE TO FIGHT! HOLY SHIT IT'S A DRAGON!!! A HUGE DRAGON THAT'S DOING HORRIBLE THINGS TO MY ASSHOLE!!! DO NOT WANT!!!!! NEVER TRUST A MOOGLE IN LEOPARD PRINT!!!

Saturday, August 13, 2011

New Soundwave 092: Starcraft 2 Tourneys, plus: What the HELL happened to Metroid!?

I'm back on this week's New Soundwave, and even occasionally visible! This week JD Church gives us the low down on the big Starcraft II tournaments, we talk more about the 3DS price drop, and I exhort everyone to play pretty much any Metroid game that isn't named Other M, and lament that the extent of Nintendo's 25th anniversary plans for the franchise seem to be using it as one of the 3DS' Early Adopter Apology Gift games.



And don't forget to check out all the TF Radio Network's podcasts, on subjects ranging from Super Sentai to Transformers to Comics to weight loss!

Demo Review: Final Fantasy Type-0

Well here I am again, though I'm sure you'll be pleased to note that I'm not doing a full review, but rather a demo review. What does that mean? That means I'm playing a demo in Japanese because I hate myself, and I'm a whore. Why do I say I'm a whore?

Please ignore that NES emulator lower on the screen. *AHEM*
Yup, it's Final Fantasy Type-0, or as you might have known it, Agito. It takes place in the Fabula Nova Crystallis: Final Fantasy mythos, or series, or whatever you want to call it, along with FFXIII, FFXIII-2 and FFXIII Versus, because Squenix HATES throwing shit away, as evidenced by the bad ass male, and hamster-cheeked vulnerable girl there. In him, I see a cross between Sephiroth and Vincent from FFVII, and in her I see Yuna from FFX and FFX-2. Already I'm filled with amused dread.

Autosave warning!
It warms my heart that they bothered to put the 'ok' in English, it really does. I then get a warning in Japanese for... something. I dunno, pudding rats. I'm treated to a surprisingly blurry/grainy intro, that I have to admit I'm somewhat disappointed with the quality. The intro did however tell me there's really only one annoying high-pitched bitch voice to deal with, so that's a plus. I picked out a number of Squenix standby VA's, but I don't really have any problem with any of them. In fact, there was a fangirl squee when I heard Demyx's VA. Beyond that, what I glean from the intro is that M. Bison has taken over a country (shock and gasp) and it's up to a group of school kids to save teh dayz!!1! Also there are crystals, summons, a moogle, a chick with GIANT KNOCKERS, more copypasta faces than you can shake a stick at, and, from my limited repitoire of Japanese, Vinceroth's brother did something bad. And the troupes go marching two by two, hoorah. The second intro I sit through is better, which is likely because it's the trailer, and in it is revealed Cloudroth, male!Tifa, Quistis, and pretty much every other face in Squenix's limited repitoire, except Fang/Terra (from Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Sleep, not FFVI), but I expect to see that as an NPC.

After the first intro I'm treated to a screen with a bunch of symbols, and then in large English text the phrase "Bump of Chicken." I... what? Is... is that a suggestion? A descriptor? Of what? What... what exactly IS a 'bump of chicken'? Exactly how much chicken comprises a bump? Shit, I dunno.

Down to business, I start a new game.

Friday, August 12, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 27 (Big Friday Update!)

And we're back for a hopefully long, hopefully interesting, if not informative, Friday update. This is also a special installment, because it's going to cover the question: "Is That Guy brain damaged?" You'll find out why, soon.

Let's start with a few things I've figured out, first.

Max level Monster Tamer! Nice!
Do you see this? This is apparently my class level screen. All of those gold stars mean that I maxed out this class some time ago, and only just noticed it. That's not all, folks! It turns out that as we went along, most people leveled out their classes! Isn't that great? But now this begs the question, how did I not notice?

Because all of the new abilities? They're one screen over from where the powers I normally use are. Yes, you heard me, I didn't know I had mastered most of the classes I've picked, because I didn't scroll one screen to the right.

So I think it's safe to say yes, I do have brain damage, thank you.

But at least all of the characters were not fully leveled out in their classes, so I took the time to go back to the last dungeon I was in, and fight the monsters inside for hours on end till I had leveled... and by that, I mean about 20 battles.

Let's move on, and pretend I'm not dumb, ok?

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 26 (GOD DAMN IT!)

...'Finklestein?'
This battle did not go as well as it did the first time... FUCK! You know what's awesome? A resurrection spell, that FAILS 9 OUT OF 10 TIMES YOU FUCKING CAST IT! WAIT! WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING OVER THERE?! GODDAMN FINKLESTEIN SHIT KID!

Ok. I'm better now, I swear. I just needed a moment or two to catch my breath is all. If you hadn't gathered, this kid is annoying the hell out of me in ways I had never thought possible, even from children. That's ok, though. Let's move on.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 25 (SON OF A WHORE!)

And we're back for our... What day is it? Wednesday. Our Wednesday update, which has a lot fewer dates in it than you might think.

Anyway last time we left, we were bored to tears with the town we're in, so we were going to leave, and find something interesting. I'm guessing that I haven't been given an adventure hook yet, so there shouldn't be anything worth note around here, yet.

Magic Key Door! Always a good sign. (But couldn't you just bust through the walls?)Aside from a small house in the middle of nowhere, that seems to be magically sealed by a Rabbi, since that's a Star of David on the door. Curse you, Seals of Solomon! Curse you! Well at least I've found somewhere that I'm sure will be important later, and that should count for something. Unfortunately, it does not, so we continue.

So we move on and look for the trigger, and to be honest, I get a good feeling from this place here.

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 24 (If that cave had a priest in it, I wouldn't go in.)

And we're back for Tuesday, where we found the trigger, and it not only rested up the party, but brought the dead back to life!

I want to find a place that offers the Nap of Ressurection.
And that's what I call a power nap.

In any case, I'm a bit stuck where to go next, so I'll check this steering wheel, because I think I'd enjoy the chance to drive an island around for a while. I'll bet that I can't though.

Looks more like a peanut than a cupcake now...
Apparently it's my week to be wrong about everything. That's cool, though, because I have a girlfriend, so I'm used to being wrong. She's editing this for my, by the way, so I just thought I'd let you all know that I'm a doodie head. {Ed note: It's not MY fault I'm always right.}

Monday, August 8, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 23 (son of a bitch!)

And we're back for Monday, where if you'll recall we were about to hop onto a sea-bound cupcake. This is likely the next big event, because I've never heard of a giant floating cupcake not being important.

I wonder if Yuji Horii knows that Coney Island is not, in fact, a giant ice cream cone?
Ohhh, it's an island. Well, that still sounds pretty unusual to me, so let's see what happens, shall we? But look at that guy at the bottom of the picture. How the hell do you even sail an island? Does this thing have a motor? Sails? Magic propulsion system, or something? Well, when I speak with him I hear something that sounds like a deep, resounding fart, and the island begins to move... Left. The person at the wheel is facing the wrong direction, and can have no idea if there's anything in its path.

We're off to an awesome start, aren't we?

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Editorial: Cheating, busywork and perfected tedium

This week I'm writing a quick editorial instead of a full review of anything, because it's been a busy damn week as I mentioned yesterday.

That Guy and AngeliqueDaemon's gamer friends have occasionally gotten on them for using cheat devices in their day-to-day offline gaming. If they don't feel like level-grinding or searching for that rare weapon? There's an app for that, and it is called the Action Replay or GameShark or Code Breaker or, if you go far enough back, the Game Genie. They save hours of their lives, and they hurt absolutely nobody.

The argument against has gone that if you're cheating, you're not meeting the challenge the game has offered, and you can't actually say that you've beaten the game at the end. My response was: so fuckin' what? If you want to meet the challenge, that's great, I'm all for it. There are people who've actually beaten Battletoads, and I'm proud of them. But it is a game. It's recreation, and if somebody wants to do something that does no harm with a single-player game they purchased- by all means do it! We all have greater challenges to meet in our non-gaming lives, frankly.


The real issue, as I see it, is this: the game should be fun, and if there's one aspect of the game that is fun, and you can remove or streamline the parts that aren't fun, why shouldn't you? You're essentially doing something that developers should've done for you long ago. I've mentioned before that I feel the genius of Pokemon is that it took one of the most-hated aspects of JRPGs- level-grinding -and made it into the game itself. Made it into an artform. Disgaea does the same thing for level-grinding and stat-tweaking. Monster Hunter essentially does the very same thing with the optional boss: every major monster fight in Monster Hunter plays like the kind of protracted side-boss battle I'd come to dread in a Final Fantasy... and it works!

So to my way of thinking, this is one of the only circumstances where it is actually appropriate to bust out the old excuse "Don't hate the player, hate the game." The old standbys of this genre can be refined, perfected, and made fun instead of being an obstacle to fun. I'm not trying to make excuses for cheating- on a non-multiplayer game no defense is required because you're basically cheating at Solitaire. But if a game isn't making the most of its systems- making every aspect of the game enjoyable, which is obviously more than possible -whose fault is that?

Saturday, August 6, 2011

New Soundwave 091: 3DS Price Drop, Arkham City, and More!

I'm not on this week due to a family medical emergency, but New Soundwave of course marches on! This week we've got the 3DS' abrupt price drop, Starcraft 2, and an 8 year-old who made the EVO fighting tourney's top 50. Good going, kid!


Friday, August 5, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 22 (Cupcakes made of grass are just about as "green" as you can get.)

And we're back for the end of the week update, or at least the end of my week... possibly. We may end up with a bit of an informational update from me over the weekend, since it's been a bit chaotic.

Now, I remembered something that should have seemed bloody damn obvious to me, right as I was sitting and contemplating my navel about where to head.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Dragon Quest VI/6 - Day 21 (Goodbye, Waldo.)

And we're back, with corpse in tow. If I remember, we were going to attempt to find a cave, weren't we? Or at least I was suspecting a cave, because let's face it, everything evil happens in castles, or caves. So off we go!

It could've been a tower! Dragon Quests loves towers.
I knew it. See, there's really nothing wrong with some old game stereotypes, because this is the sort of thing that happens in good fantasy stories. Bilbo didn't go to the south Bronx to rob Smaug, and I sure as hell wouldn't blame him for it.