We don't always like being nonplussed

Saturday, April 23, 2011

Final Fantasy VI Day 13: In which everything goes Purplinkle

Alright, where was I? I'll be honest with you, I've screwed off quite a bit, played Eternal Sonata, Dragon Quest IX, Pokemon White (of course), and Okami, so my gaming scheduling has been a bit full, and I've been putting off the level grinding. But I'm back now, and I'm trying to learn Fire and Ice magic from Shiva and Ifrit's corpses. I find that the flans in the death pit are assholes, and all but REQUIRE magic to slay, so I bounce out of there looking for tastier fare... and the way out. Up some stairs, I find these:



Apparently they're here to inject me with something in order to find out where I put the plans to the Death Star that I'm sending to the Rebel Army.
After I off them, I head up ten million flights of stairs to test tube land:


These are, in fact, killing jars for Espers, we find out later, and one day I'll be back to collect the delicious, delicious magicite from the wreckage.


I think someone left the window open... How the HELL did THAT get into a science lab? Was it something they were making that escaped, or was it just nesting in the industrial rafters? In addition to giant awful vultures, there are also some dinosaurs running loose, and I'm beginning to wonder about the working conditions in the Empire. There's also this guy:


and he looks pretty damn ominous. And wouldn't you just know it, that's the only way out of here. Well, let's heal up and then go poke him with a stick.



He confused Mash while I'm trying to get a picture for you, THAT'S what happens. Shit! Mash is made entirely out of death and poison right now. Wish me luck! Well Edgar was poisoned, but he got better, and Celes stabbed Mash out of his confusion, and we beat him, so hooray! With him out of the way of the door, it's time to move on with the show!



Well the rest of the show seems to include espers floating in goo, so this can only get better from here. Sorry for the blurry pictures, but they ARE bobbing around. Let's see if I can free them and get their souls. There seem to be six espers in total here, and if I had to make a guess, I'd say among them are... Madeen, Leviathan, Rapidash, Pickled Pig Fetus, Shadow Weaver, and Bleached Cow Skull. There seems to be a big red button at the back of the room, and much like Doctor Who, when I see a big red button that must not under any circumstances be pressed... I have to press it so hard and so fast no one even has time to get out the first letter of their warning...

........ Remember when I mentioned the tubes were killing jars? Holy shit, I just killed the whole lot of them. Um... I'm sorry?


Rainslicker Cid isn't too happy about it either. In fact he seems VERY upset that I released acetone into his killing jars and offed all his butterflies. I'd be upset too. All of the magicite then breaks free and dives at their murderer... which would be me, and then... I get them? So... was this a mercy killing? Well if it gives me magicite, then just call me Doctor Kervorkian, and let's move on. My party unstacks, and it seems like it's time to have some talky bits. Locke freaks out over something, sorry I didn't get the picture, but then he interrupts Celes and Cid's talk... but before anything can be done, other than saying Celes' name, Kefka laughs up to the group, as he does.

He hops about a bit like an angry leprechaun and then starts talking to the traitor, Celes. Et tu, Boobies? Locke seems surprised Kefka and Celes know each other, but considering that they're TWO of the Empire's THREE great generals, I would have assumed that they had met... There was even a picture of them Sig Heil-ing together back in one of the first posts. Geez Locke, where have you been? Kefka says something, laughs, and then calls in some Biggs and Wedges in magitek. Oh boy.

And then everything turns red, we get rammed, and everything turns purplinkle.


It's Celes' turn to just hang out this time, and Mash once more landed on his head with his mouth hanging open. Awesome. Celes hops back up on the walkway and turns everything blue:


Kefka seems less than pleased. Everything turns pixely, and the Empire peeps, Celes included, disappear. Locke, how dos that feel?



I'd be sadder if, a) I knew what was going on, and b) Mash didn't look so fucking FUNNY! The Figaro boys get up, ask Locke what's up, Cid shows up, the building starts shaking, and then we run after Cid... who starts pouring out his life story. I'd care more if I knew what you were saying bro. I get a save point, and now it seems it's time to do some annoying escape wumbo. Oh joy. Well, no time like the present. Just as I thought, I talk to Cid, Kefka laughs, Cid throws me in a mine cart, and off we go... to be attacked by purple sharks on tires:



I make no promises about the quality of that picture, the background is moving. Did I mention the abominations throw tires at you? They do. Luckily Mash seems to be strong against Shark, so we're doing pretty well. I'm still a little butthurt about the fact that Celes disappeared with the healing magicite though, but I guess I'll get over it.


Well, this looks like a boss... let's see how this goes then, shall we? Some... talon hanging out of his butt seemed to be attacking me... that was disturbing. On the upside, everyone learned piles of new magic, and we crashed into a Biggs (Wedge?) so hard we sent him and his magitek flying off the ledge. Awesome. I hit up a save point, tent, and shuffle some magic around. What happens next? Find out tomorrow as we conclude our daring escape from the Empire, and I whine some more about losing my healing magicite! How will I has spells that restoe HP now?!

Watch me find out later that like, it automatically unequipped her, and I still have all her stuff... that's about how it usually works for me. Until tomorrow!

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